Monday, February 13, 2006

This Is Only A Test

One way to look at family expansion is that it's just another way to test patience and understanding. I'm still trying to figure out if I passed my test.

Actual conversation with adopted mother-in-law (AMIL):

Me: Morning. Would you like some coffee?
AMIL: Goooood morning. Have I told you about my sister that was married to the guy that grew coffee?
Me: No, I don't think I've heard of that one. Coffee?
AMIL: Well, my sister was married to a guy in a band. He ran off with a girl from the band so my sister divorced him. Then, she married on the rebound to a guy that was all business, except for in the bedroom. Subsequently, she started drinking to fill the void left by her sexless marriage. She then divorced the businessman and went into rehab. She met a counselor in rehab and began dating him. While this was frowned upon, they believed they were in love. The counselor quit his job when she got out of rehab and they moved in together in his home where he grew coffee in his yard. He had quite a nice piece of property so my sister was very excited to start a new life with him. They married a couple months later. Well, one day my sister was just getting out of the shower -she takes the longest showers- and there was a knock at the door. Who do you think it was?
Me: --shrugs shoulders--
AMIL: The FBI, of course! Turns out Mr. Coffee was growing marijuana along with coffee in the backyard. My sister was shocked though I don't know how she could have been- she barely knew him! Mr. Coffee was arrested and she visited him in jail for six months before divorcing him. Can you believe that?
Me: Wow. So, would you like some coffee?


deepThoughts said...

That's funny!! You are being a great soul by doing this for your sister. Good luck!

Sister Buckle said...

First thing I'd do with ANY man with a crop in his yeard is go out there and take a good bloody look!

Wear good boots. Don't want snakebites.

I could see the weed coming as soon as I heard the word 'grew'.