Wednesday, August 08, 2007

I look forward to actually being awake in every class

In a few weeks, I'll be starting school again. I have books, I paid tuition (then threw up- seriously, when did it get so high?) and I even have a cute little student ID entitling me to absolutely nothing other than a discount movie admission, which I will no longer have time to see.

Over the last few weeks, I've been trying to mentally prepare myself for being student again. I am surprisingly more thrilled about this go 'round than I was the first time. I loved college, the time, the friends, and even some of the learning, but it was always a means to an end for me. I'll never forget the way I felt the Spring of my junior year when I sat in the counselor's office, going over my credits and learning that I really was just a year and a half from graduation. That was the light at the end of the tunnel for me, I was finally going to be finished and ready for "real" life. How innocently that plan formulated in my head.

Now, obviously, it's different. Now it's not only the means-to-an-end concept that motivates me, it's what excites me. It's taken me a good five years to "figure out" what I think I should be doing to further my education and to come to the conclusion that I do not want to be in a finance class, ever again. In my entire life. No thank you. Clear enough? Seems simple now, but I thought an M.B.A. was always going to be my next step. I thought that was the logical thing to do for my career, a career that I am good at but am not passionate about- at least not the kind of passion I want to usher me into the next stages of my life. I finally reasoned that when you're guaranteed almost nothing in the future, it's a good idea to do something you're excited about in the meantime.

So that's what I'm setting out to do. I'm a little nervous, I'll be in a classroom again. I actually asked my mother the other day, half joking and half serious, "what if no one talks to me?" Which is just silly. I mean, when has that ever been a concern? We all know that I will just talk to them anyway. And that they will immediately decide that I am super cool and they want to be my friend forever and ever. Or maybe that's just what my mother said.

With this coming up, along with everything else happening at the natural full-speed-ahead style of August, I've lost a little sleep. That's acceptable, though. Who needs sleep when you have text books and parking passes and are already in a place where you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I can see it, and it feels good. As long as I don't start having any of those dreams where I'm in my underwear and can't remember the combination to my locker.

17 comments:

Danielle said...

Oh I can so relate to this post. Of course mine is leading toward the MBA track (for now, mainly because it's the most beneficial to me, after that who knows!). So what is it you are going to do?? I'm actually looking forward to the start of classes myself...It is a bit nerve racking starting up classes and wondering about people, and getting to know new people, group work and all that good stuff. I'm sure it will all be just fine though!

The Exception said...

I loved getting my MA. You are a step ahead of where I was when I started as you know where your passion lies. It took me a year to find mine, but when I did... it was amazing.

What are you studying?

One of my friend's in graduate school had been out of school for years. She wasn't sure how to behave but her biggest concern was..."what should I wear?"

Enjoy it!!

OC said...

Your post actually just motivated me... I had to call my MBA program and say, "Hey... how come I don't have a student ID or a parking pass... and I start in three weeks??? Don't I need to get textbooks or something?"

So thank you. Now I know that I have an orientation to go to that they never sent me any information on. I forgot how much fun it was to deal with universities. What are you studying? Are you going part time?

Bre said...

Just don't go shotgunning beers at the frat houses or I'm going to have to come out there and adjudicate you myself!

I'm so excited for you- a brand new adventure! And also, they'll all talk to you, obviously - who wouldn't?!

Runner Girl FL said...

I felt the same way about grad school. It was no longer the drudge. "I get to" go to school instead of "I have to" go to school was fun. It did wear off durring Grad School but soon after was that light at the end of the tunnel to keep me going.

Good Luck and enjoy school.... And the best part....NEW SCHOOL Supplies...pens and pencils and erasers.... sigh

e.b. said...

Oh it does all seem so exciting - the newness of it and the fresh experience and what it leads to. The joy of being in school again, new school supplies, new back to school clothes (sigh, if only, right?) but that is what it conjures up.

More than that good luck! Everyone will like you! And it seems like a great step forward.

Sizzle said...

I always thought I'd end up in Grad School but now I feel like I wouldn't no how to study. My attention span is so short! It's so great that you are going back- yay you!

justacoolcat said...

I can't even imagine the dreams I'd have if I started school again.

I think you're just going back for the boys.

sue said...

Just have fun, 'kay?

one little acorn said...

I can pick up the excitement through your post. Congratulations. I went back to school at 29 (having travelled overseas for nearly 8 years) and loved it. At that age I was a major step ahead of so many of the other students as I WANTED to be there. There is something really motivational about learning again!
Enjoy!
... thanks for dropping by my blog.

Airam said...

Good luck with your program!

Mine finishes up in about a week but I worked while going to school.

You're going to be great and you'll make lots of new friends!

Backofpack said...

Okay, I'm a mite confused. Are you going for an MBA? I read "not" but the comments make me think I didn't get it right. If not, then what are you going for?

I went back for my masters at...let me figure this out...41 years old. I have never been sorry (except when I was working on homework and a thesis project and stuff). My BS is in Computer Sci and I spent seven years as a programmer/analyst (back in the days of Cobol), my Masters is in Ed, which is where my heart lies. Nice!

Nicole said...

Yay school. I love back to school shopping! What fun. Good luck

Nat said...

You'll do great. It isn't easy to go back. I've thought about going back for a J.D. numerous times but still am not sure if it's the right choice. Good for you on going after what you want!

Barbara Bruederlin said...

That actually happened to me - the underwear and not remembering my combination thing.

Every September I want to go back to university. And then I remember that I work at one, but somehow it's not the same at all. Jealous I am!

Josh said...

you know, even if the other kids don't talk to you we'll still like you. And it'll give you good fodder for the blog!

Good luck!

Sempre Libera said...

Congrats to you on going back! I'm looking at heading back for the MA in a few years too, so I can't wait to hear all about it.