tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post9192841213147528219..comments2023-09-19T05:52:12.082-06:00Comments on Just Run: Pursuing ItJustRunhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03621925857881380555noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-27699263212455075732007-04-16T03:38:00.000-06:002007-04-16T03:38:00.000-06:00I recently did something similarto what your frien...I recently did <A HREF="http://death-of-a-salesman.blogspot.com/2007/04/moving-on.html" REL="nofollow">something similar</A><BR/>to what your friend did.Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16888125796129754219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-55643915012064978732007-04-13T05:37:00.000-06:002007-04-13T05:37:00.000-06:00Egan- Will do.GG- I think "figuring it out" takes...Egan- Will do.<BR/><BR/>GG- I think "figuring it out" takes a lifetime. I also think, though, that we get little clues to it all the time and if we're open to seeing them, we can't go wrong. Deep down, and often not so deep down, we know what's right.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-27250671737129464252007-04-13T03:42:00.000-06:002007-04-13T03:42:00.000-06:00I don't think you can know weather it's right unti...I don't think you can know weather it's right until you give it a shot. What you can be sure of is being unhappy which is what pushes people to look for happiness. The act of looking for happiness is an act of courage. It's easy to sort of find comfort in an unhappy situation. At least you know what you have. Picking up and leaving for the unknown takes balls. As does looking for it outside of a current relationship. Nothing guarantees that you leave an unhappy relationship for a happy one. After all, you never really know someone until sometimes it's too late. I think the key to happiness if knowing what it is that makes you happy, I still haven't figured it out.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-50637175338770566282007-04-13T00:55:00.000-06:002007-04-13T00:55:00.000-06:00Let me know your little experiment works. I think...Let me know your little experiment works. I think friends are pretty aware of your moods so this should be interesting.eganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03783658744477659987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-81073866208181662182007-04-12T21:04:00.000-06:002007-04-12T21:04:00.000-06:00Dawn- I understand. Of course, that might be beca...Dawn- I understand. Of course, that might be because I've been contemplating a move myself.<BR/><BR/>Nicole- I think being able to laugh is half the battle. <BR/>All the happiness in the world to you, as well.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-61931574712322632062007-04-12T20:31:00.000-06:002007-04-12T20:31:00.000-06:00Wow! What a great post. Its funny as a kid I nev...Wow! What a great post. Its funny as a kid I never had a care in the world and was happy all the time. My sister and I would chase each other around, make mud pies, cook and clean with my grandma. And, now life is definitely more complicated and maybe if we just played more we might not be so stressed out, angry, or depressed. I can't say I've been the happiest these last two years but I can definitely laugh at myself. <BR/><BR/>Hope you find much happiness in your life now and always.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-20988967076259105712007-04-12T20:23:00.000-06:002007-04-12T20:23:00.000-06:00I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Last ...I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Last summer I wanted to move home, because I thought I was running away from something.<BR/><BR/>So I decided to sign my contract and stay.<BR/><BR/>Now I'm like...I don't wanna stay!<BR/><BR/>Oh well. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-85446071011721257302007-04-12T19:30:00.000-06:002007-04-12T19:30:00.000-06:00Egan- I honestly did not think of that, to ask my ...Egan- I honestly did not think of that, to ask my friends. Hmmm, I might have to do a little experiment.<BR/><BR/>Brandy- I couldn't agree more- it's in the little things. Which I think we have to choose to see.<BR/><BR/>Danielle- It's hard to explain, but I really think it's about finding a balance between the "try" and the "acceptace" efforts.<BR/><BR/>Barb- I agree with that, too. Sometimes, life just isn't going to hand it to you. Then again, this is coming from the girl that digs through crap looking for a pony.JustRunhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03621925857881380555noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-5185728468876434292007-04-12T15:45:00.000-06:002007-04-12T15:45:00.000-06:00Those are very interesting questions you've posed....Those are very interesting questions you've posed.<BR/><BR/>The concept of personal happiness is actually relatively new. We now expect to be happy, 100 years ago people did not really think about happiness as a right, as we do now. Frankly, they likely didn't have time to indulge in such ideas. <BR/><BR/>And while I agree with most people here that happiness is something which only you can create for yourself, I think we also have to acknowledge and accept that at times we will not be happy, and draw upon our personal strength to deal with those situations as best we can.Barbara Bruederlinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14476249934930666695noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-32377799977318230942007-04-12T14:23:00.000-06:002007-04-12T14:23:00.000-06:00Wow...is it springtime that brings this out? I kno...Wow...is it springtime that brings this out? I know lately I've been contemplating my own happiness and peace and place in this world and I finally decided that happiness is something you can seek or you can accept. I'm unhappy in a job I'm working, that's very obvious by some of my blogs, and tired of the negative, but instead of letting it get to me, I finally just pushed it out and am pouring forth more positive in the things I do there, hoping to counter. It isn't always easy (particularly if I work two days in a row) but I'm trying. I'm also just trying to be positive and happy with all things in my life, figuring the things I can control and just letting others go. <BR/><BR/>Now at the expense of someone else...that's not good. The cheating I don't agree with. It's one thing to decide you aren't happy in the marriage and figure out you have to either change things or end it, it's not good for kids to grow up in that either, but to just start screwing around...<BR/><BR/>Happiness I also agree is where you make it. You can't be happy someplace else if you aren't happy with who you are, while if you are happy with who you are, you can be happy anywhere right? At least that's the theory. Me, I'm working on being happy with who I am...then we'll figure out where I want to be (beach and warm come to mind!)Daniellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17638725150045549860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-53253240469883186092007-04-12T13:33:00.000-06:002007-04-12T13:33:00.000-06:00Happiness is like perfect jeans, my spare set of k...Happiness is like perfect jeans, my spare set of keys or a man who understands my brand of crazy. Looking for it never results in me finding it, neither does waiting for it, wishing for it, or turning my life upside for it. I find that happiness comes when I'm running late, it's raining but I find a cab right when I need it. I'm just working on keeping the happy feeling...brandyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14353594558144154909noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-32034078968395025442007-04-12T12:14:00.000-06:002007-04-12T12:14:00.000-06:00I'm guessing I find happiness the same way you mig...I'm guessing I find happiness the same way you might. By taking care of myself via exercise, engaging hobbies, and spending time with my wife and friends. <BR/><BR/>The second scenario is sad. Why someone would think cheating on their spouse is sound alternative is bizarre. The consequences of those actions are never worth it. If you're not happy, break up, then move on. <BR/><BR/>How do you know happiness is right? Huh, good question. I think that's a question friends can answer for you. They can see it on your face. Good topic.eganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03783658744477659987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-32422924991024624562007-04-12T11:23:00.000-06:002007-04-12T11:23:00.000-06:00RGF- I think you hit it on the head when you said ...RGF- I think you hit it on the head when you said be honest. I think in the second situation I mentioned, there is honesty lacking. Not that people aren't trying, they're just refusing to see the entire picture of who/what they're affecting.<BR/><BR/>Bre- That's an excellent analogy- I have used it myself. I, like you, will dig for as long as it takes.<BR/><BR/>Michelle- You and I are on the same page about so many things. Perhaps that's what makes situation #2 so difficult for me to believe in- there are children affected and to me, leaving children behind so that one is able to "find love" and be happy is one of the most selfish and irresponisble things a parent can do.<BR/><BR/>Ginger- Excellent point. I think escape can provide us with happiness. If we're not healthy enough or willing to take on the reality of it, it's just going to (for lack of a better phrase) bite us in the ass in the end.<BR/><BR/><BR/>SL- I think that might be the worst of it, using "happiness" to justify the why's of our choices with no regard for others. I just don't see how something that would feel wrong (at least to me) can equal happiness.<BR/><BR/>Lia- I agree, sometimes we just know when something feels right. And yes, wherever we go, there we are but in line with your belief, sometimes we can "be" in one place a whole hell of a lot better than we can be anywhere else.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-3537611272046514732007-04-12T10:10:00.000-06:002007-04-12T10:10:00.000-06:00Whever you go, you take youself with you. Happine...Whever you go, you take youself with you. Happiness depends on who you are inside, not on the place. That said, I made a radical move twice. The first time I did not leave behind a place - I left a life, a continent, a country, a family, and everything I have ever known. As extreme as it sounds, this move was just a simple variation on the common fate of the immigrant. After 9 years, I did my second move. This time I exchanged New York for New Mexico. As simple as it sounds, this was the true gesture that brought me happiness. I love the desert. I bloomed here. <BR/><BR/>I believe in the spirit of place.runliarunhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07367107576228601621noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-3906384879749734162007-04-12T09:23:00.000-06:002007-04-12T09:23:00.000-06:00Deep post today.I think that some people cannot lo...Deep post today.<BR/><BR/>I think that some people cannot look inside and find true happiness. It comes as a form of escape or fantasy land. They feel they cannot be happy in their own world, so they create another one in which to be happy, at whatever cost to anyone else. In fantasy land, they don't see the hurt.<BR/><BR/>To find that happiness, they need to look deep inside and face their own reality. To some people, that's so scary and so painful, they live forever in fantasyland. But others can learn to move on and really find happiness in themselves and their surroundings.<BR/><BR/>Bottom line? You create your own reality.Ginger Breadmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09024143089442382318noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-13789305963400416602007-04-12T09:12:00.000-06:002007-04-12T09:12:00.000-06:00Have you ever heard the expression "where ever you...Have you ever heard the expression "where ever you go, there you are"? It is simply saying that you are who you are - to really find happiness, you have to dig deep and make concious choices to find it, and to realize that if you just move, or change partners, but continue living as you always had - in other words, changing your surroundings (inluding people) but not yourself, then you've just moved your problems along with you. <BR/><BR/>I fully agree - you have to make a choice to be happy. Fact is, you have a choice about every single thing in your life, and you have a choice about your response to it. Being happy requires work. Being married, or in a relationship (even a friendship) requires work. <BR/><BR/>I also agree about hurting others. I'm not talking about not meeting some one else's expectations, but more about the fundamental changing of their lives, in order to pursue your own happiness. In the case of divorce, no one but the two people involved can know whether it is right or not; and I do believe there are times when a person absolutely has to leave a marriage for their own sake. However, in my opinion, before you leave, you give it everything you've got, you pour your heart and soul into making it work. Then, if you walk away, you know you gave it your all. What I disagree with are the cases where a parent chooses to walk away from the family, to leave their children, in pursuit of another. I've seen and dealt with the children that are left behind - some are resilient and bounce back, but too often, the damage is done. I believe if you bring a child into this world, and you choose to keep it, then you are making a commitment that cannot and should not be broken. For at least 18 years, the needs of that child supersede your own. After that, then you can go your own way.<BR/><BR/>Hmmmm...did you hit a hot button or what?Backofpackhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13779487553272296752noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-89923907745421505412007-04-12T08:56:00.000-06:002007-04-12T08:56:00.000-06:00Ok, for me, happiness is like finding a good pair ...Ok, for me, happiness is like finding a good pair of shoes (oh come on, you knew I'd go there). I used to work at a suck-out-your-soul job that was high end, but always rubbed me the wrong way. I got blisters.<BR/><BR/>My job now is harrowing, it pays to little, it demands too much, but I love it. It's a perfect fit.<BR/><BR/>I think it's easy to purchase the wrong shoe because it's in style, it looks nice, it'd be comfortable if you didn't stand for more than 5 minutes, whatever. But overall, I'm happier when I keep digging to find the pair that meets all of my needs without the blistering!<BR/><BR/>For the record, I'm certainly not entirely happy - but I'm willing to continue chasing after it.Brehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02718080604008513653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-42541312764882018132007-04-12T08:36:00.000-06:002007-04-12T08:36:00.000-06:00I think you are right about not hurting someone el...I think you are right about not hurting someone else in the process of finding your happiness.<BR/><BR/>I believe that if you do what is right and are true and honest to your self and others... not hiding anything and you live simply and honestly that happy will follow. This is the first example. He is being true to himself and as you pointed out he is taking a chance but it is for the right reasons. <BR/><BR/>Not that doing the right thing is always easy but by doing it you will know you did your best and not have to "live with the consequences" as you sited in your second example.Runner Girl FLhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05755283547202964546noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-994304303667385752007-04-12T08:32:00.000-06:002007-04-12T08:32:00.000-06:00EB- I couldn't agree more about convincing ourselv...EB- I couldn't agree more about convincing ourselves of happiness (or unhappiness, as the case might be).<BR/><BR/>Sizzle- That does make perfect sense. I know I barely touched on the whole "if it affects others" caveat. There is always that difference between affecting others and trying to please them- I think learning to draw the line is very powerful.JustRunhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03621925857881380555noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-90969064934164737192007-04-12T08:29:00.000-06:002007-04-12T08:29:00.000-06:00i think we should all chase our happiness, in what...i think we should all chase our happiness, in whatever form, and yes, try not to hurt other people in that pursuit but unfortunately it's not always avoidable. i think too many people stuff their own wants and needs and shots at happiness for the sake of other people. it's a tangled knot and each person, individually, has to find their own way to untangle it. <BR/><BR/>for a long time i did what i thought everyone else wanted me to do and pretended i was happy. i was not. i lost some friendship in the pursuit of becoming my true self, in finding my happiness, and i can't say i regret it. sure, i didn't purposely hurt anyone but sometimes you have to choose you.<BR/><BR/>i hope that makes sense.Sizzlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00182860438430294750noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21226961.post-14162058654237913612007-04-12T07:42:00.000-06:002007-04-12T07:42:00.000-06:00I think about this ALL THE TIME. I am constantly f...I think about this ALL THE TIME. I am constantly figuring out what makes me/us happy, how long it lasts, the science of happiness if you will. It is fascinating. I also think we can convince ourselves of anything - which is both a good and bad thing. But that our mind is very powerful in that way and can control.annehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15439772399487069107noreply@blogger.com